So I found myself imagining that a new relationship, this time with the right person, would help me climb out of the ditch the divorce left me in.People offered me all sorts of advice to talk me out of rebounding, but nobody was able to change my determined mind.Rebounding isn’t something that happens once with a single partner; it’s an emotional state that a grieving person undergoes after a break-up, and there isn’t a limit on how long that grieving takes, nor are there fool-proof steps to get through the grief faster.◊♦◊We all have our own selfish reasons for leaving our partners, just as we sometimes have our own selfish reasons for staying.
You don’t know the whole story of their life after you, and you have no business knowing, anyway.
The only thing you need to know is how to measure your happiness independently, not relative to your ex’s.◊♦◊I announced my divorce on Facebook because I wanted the love and support of others as I made the difficult transition into single life.
When things didn’t work out, I was sad, but I was relieved to know that the “rebounding” part of my post-divorce dating life was over and that now I could go find my next true love.
The next woman I dated was a rebound, too, as was the woman I would eventually commit to a serious relationship with.
The fact that they were wrong for us doesn’t mean they deserve to be alone and miserable for the rest of their life.
your ex with their next partner (which you will, thanks to the pervasiveness of social media), it’s hard not to take it personally, especially if you’re still in that emotional “rebounding” state while they appear to have moved on.
This exacerbates your vulnerability and makes you more likely to jump into a relationship you aren’t ready for with a person who is wrong for you.
Bottom line: no matter what you see on social media, you don’t know your ex’s actual situation.
Friends aren’t always as reliable as romantic partners, dating prospects can dry up, and the depression of heartbreak often impedes personal growth.
People told me not to get a new girlfriend until that growth was complete, but it’s never complete, is it?
I looked forward to the freedom associated with single life.